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Couples Counseling

Couples may inquire about counseling in reference to a large number of needs or wants in their relationship. Pre-marriage, ongoing relationship or divorce counseling are often pivotal places in a couples relationship that speak to a need for new and improved relations. This is a thoughtful, patient and creative endeavor. As therapist, I attend to issues of lost, broken or "ought to" connections that have impeded the resiliancey of the relationship.

Conflict negotiation and resolution are important areas of the work. Here the art of negotiation is paramount. The couple learns about give and take, about how to resolve ongoing issues without receiving ALL of what they need or want. Life within the partnership/marriage must be a series of compromises and members learn in an empathic way, how to manage this wihtin the session They develop confidence in this regard and will know how to take these skills back to their own living rooms with ongoing success.

I work with the couple, to make meaningful contact with the anger and conflicts; to explore them and facilitate the underlying meaningful connections that are deeply significant to them. These connections further enable the couple to resolve their differences in an amicable way or to re-connect them to the love relationship they wish to rekindle. Some relationships do need to end and this is carefully and methodically explored from session to session. Often, in these cases, both persons have given up hope. I may give "homework" for the couple to do; individually or as a couple. This helps each member decide what he or she is looking for long-term, whether this be in or outside of the marriage.
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